Co-Sleeping

Most of you know that we co-sleep with Genevieve.  At first, she slept on her own in her bassinet beside our bed, but suffered from reflux, so sleeping on her back wasn't much of an option anymore.  She then started sleeping in her bouncey chair, but after a couple weeks of that she would also start waking up as soon as she was put in it.  Finally, she started falling asleep with Dan and one night we had been up so many times he just left her there so we could at least get a couple hours of sleep.  She doesn't want much to do with her bouncer unless she's awake and in a good mood and will not sleep flat on her back either.  She is a tummy sleeper.  Sometimes she'll sleep on her own on her belly for a few hours, but she sleeps best when she co-sleeps with us.  I know a lot of people are against it and think she'll be sleeping with us until she's 5, but I tend to disagree.  I've researched a lot about this because I was also concerned about the same thing.  Here are a few findings I've stumbled across --

"1. Babies sleep better

Sleepsharing babies usually go to sleep and stay asleep better. Being parented to sleep at the breast of mother or in the arms of father creates a healthy go-to-sleep attitude. Baby learns that going to sleep is a pleasant state to enter (one of our goals of nighttime parenting).

2. Mothers sleep better

Many mothers and infants are able to achieve nighttime harmony: babies and mothers get their sleep cycles in sync with one another.

3. Breastfeeding is easier

Most veteran breastfeeding mothers have, for survival, learned that sharing sleep makes breastfeeding easier. Breastfeeding mothers find it easier than bottlefeeding mothers to get their sleep cycles in sync with their babies. They often wake up just before the babies awaken for a feeding. By being there and anticipating the feeding, mother can breastfeed baby back to a deep sleep before baby (and often mother) fully awakens.

4. It's contemporary parenting

Sleepsharing is even more relevant in today's busy lifestyles. As more and more mothers, out of necessity, are separated from their baby during the day, sleeping with their baby at night allows them to reconnect and make up for missed touch time during the day. As a nighttime perk, the relaxing hormones that are produced in response to baby nursing relax a mother and help her wind down from the tension of a busy day's work.

5. Babies thrive better

Over the past thirty years of observing sleepsharing families in our pediatric practice, we have noticed one medical benefit that stands out; these babies thrive . "Thriving" means not only getting bigger, but also growing to your full potential, emotionally, physically, and intellectually. Perhaps it's the extra touch that stimulates development, or perhaps the extra feedings (yes, sleepsharing infants breastfeed more often than solo sleepers).

6. Parents and infants become more connected

Remember that becoming connected is the basis of parenting, and one of your early goals of parenting.

7. Reduces the risk of SIDS

New research is showing what parents the world over have long suspected: infants who sleep safely nestled next to parents are less likely to succumb to the tragedy of SIDS." -- Dr. Sears

"Interestingly, “co-dependence”  is not a nasty word; indeed, co-dependence and interdependence in general is indispensable to maximize healthy human development and is especially critical for human infants, born so neurologically immature at birth. Interestingly, but not really surprising, when a human infants inherent need for contact and proximity (reassurance through touch, parent directed vocalizations, emotional support) are met by parents early in their lives rather than becoming “dependent” as is always suggested in the popular press the reverse is actually true: that is, early dependence leads to early independence and self sufficiency and, perhaps even, enhanced self –confidence. Some people confuse an infant’s willingness to sooth itself back to sleep as a sign of “independence”, autonomy and/or a life long sense of confidence. But life long self sufficiency and/or confidence (and, trust, for that matter) has absolutely nothing to do with the age at which an infant puts its self back to sleep without its parent or loved one, i.e. to “self soothe”. All children eventually learn how to put themselves back to sleep. What is really being pushed on parents here is the arbitrary social idea and/or judgment that the earlier the infant does not need intervention the better (in some way for the infant and eventual child and adult) and this concept is inappropriately used as a weapon often by false claims suggesting that if an infant or child cannot by some pre-determined age “self-soothe” it never will, or that something is either wrong with them, and is in need of repair, or that their parents are deficient  (for not setting “boundaries”)." -- UND



We had never planned to co-sleep, but it works for us right now.  She is happy and sleeps between 6-8 hours straight almost every night (except for the occasional party at 2 AM)  and we also get our rest and it's not really an issue with us at this point.  She definitely won't be in our bed until she is 5 and she is able to sleep alone, but definitely doesn't sleep as well.  I'm not sure when she'll move to her crib for an entire night.  Maybe next week, maybe in a month, maybe a few months, but right now we're all getting sleep at night and okay with it, so we'll leave it as it is.  :)